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PRINCIPALITY OF SALCOMBE AD2250 |
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2008 Missives: January February March April May June July August September October |
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MISSIVE TWENTY THREE - January 2008 2008 has got off to a grand start for your ‘struck off’ Admiral. Most notable of the many functions to date has been the Civic Evening hosted by Salcombe’s Mayor, Gaynor Tabiner who very properly had me seated (with my good lady wife) at head table. Most memorable was her speech or should I say closing ‘instruction’ that we all walk to Bolt Head the following day and look back at Salcombe. To which I humbly ask; why would I do that? Now if she’d said go to Bolt Head and look for a UFO, I’d find that a far more worthy pursuit to engage in, because (as you well know), I believe our contemplation and study of the Universe to be a priority obligation. On which matter I had no idea until last night that there’s a school of scientific thought which says ‘space’ has always been there. How can it have always been there, and then again ‘what is it’ because I can’t touch it? Oh dear, I feel a rather inadequate leader today! SALCOMBE TODAY I’m told the town will not be hosting The (annual) Salcombe Festival this year, which is sad news. However I totally accept the notion it is sometimes wise to pause, reflect and re- engage with a project, rather than become a zombie on its treadmill, with the disappointments that must eventually bring.. So this will be a year for such reflective purpose, but the committee still promise aural and visual experiences – or to quote an old chum, “You’ll be fund raising, Alex?” This after calling me a pompous ass! (www.salcombefestival.com). ‘Stiltwalkers’ (Copyright Consent: David & Charles Publishers Ltd
SALCOMBE IN THE WORLD Another function I’ve recently attended was the Kingsbridge and Salcombe Chamber of Commerce meeting at ‘The Marine’ (16th instant), where the new owners talked about the site’s future as a boutique hotel and luxury apartments. Of course there are those amongst us who are hugely cynical as to the eventual content of the development and question if Salcombe really will have its landmark hotel to return balance to the town’s economy, and boost it’s international standing. It’s all about fear that the end product will just be apartments and houses for outside investors, but I’m heartened we seem to have a newish ‘blow in’ on the Town Council, whose name I hope soon to divulge. Our recent conversation led me to believe he / she would support a no nonsense approach to the planning process, although being supportive to a design of ‘stunning excellence’ for the waterfront. If this means ‘modern – with glass and clean profiles’, I’ll support him / her wholeheartedly* As ever, Alex. You are invited to correspond with The 'admirable' Admiral Alexander Admiral by Email: |
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MISSIVE TWENTY FOUR - February 2008 Standing on Snapes, I’m minded to suggest the new parallel pontoons are not a very sympathetic inclusion in the otherwise glorious scenic environment. I have no problem whatsoever with the added facility and realise the need for The Harbour Board to increase revenue. However I’d suggest the moorings be realigned in their two groups, and staggered to break the railway effect. As an added concern I worry that a fire or major incident within the confined space might lead to a chaotic experience as boats find themselves trapped and unable to navigate an orderly exit without turning on ninety degrees. It’s my case that to be taken seriously in the global community, we must move the cause of politics back to basics, and immediately I’m reminded of that part of my youth when I spent fruitful hours at Speakers Corner in London’s Hyde Park. Around that wonderful cell of democratic energy I listened to brave and sometimes ‘highly questionable’ people as they challenged the State and championed many grand ideas. Let’s therefore borrow from this ‘model’ for the beginning of our new ‘politic’, and instantly I cast my sights on ‘Coleman’s Corner’. ‘Now that is Absolutely Brilliant Alex - Stunning’ – though I say so myself! |
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MISSIVE TWENTY FIVE - March 2008 What on earth was Simpson doing over there, and did he sign a disclaimer that if arrested it’s his own damn fault and he would not expect taxpayers money to be spent getting him back. I thought we had MI6 to tell the Government / public what’s going on in these highly charged territories, whilst on the question of Prince Harry, you’re obviously a decent chap, but I’m afraid there’s a tough price for being born with blue blood ‘me old china’ and you’ll just have to ‘stay put’ in future! (Missive 14) As you know POS sees the economic future of Salcombe best secured through a policy of ‘inclusiveness’ with those who don’t live here, but who love the town. We can sift out and deal with the bovine rude from the Shires, but there are many who have fine minds and generous spirits when it comes to Salcombe, and David mentioned one such person had come forward to help with the Festival, whilst another act of excellence was reported in the Gazette (7th March 08) concerning the way 2nd ‘homers’ helped finance the refurbished village hall at East Portlemouth. SALCOMBE IN THE WORLD In supporting the idea of an international hotel on the Marine site, let this (please) be the last occasion when a developer is able to tell us it’s necessary to build a large number of luxury houses to justify the land purchase and new build speculation. It’s better the people who sell land and the potential buyers know it’s value is in its existing use, and that nothing else is possible unless there are exceptional circumstances, such as the site being owned by a local charity where any windfall / profit will remain in the community. To ‘wit’ my eyes turn to Cliff House nearby!
As ever, Alex. |
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(I tried to explain to the Coroner that the unrecognisable soul they had scraped off the road may well have been on the cusp of finding Garig, but my suggestion was way over the fool’s head as he pronounced “Death by careless stumbling”. ----- Alex) SALCOMBE TODAY
Well I dare anyone to question the wisdom of the Red Arrows arriving during Regatta Week, except I believe the Harbour Master has registered his concern. It seems the whole community has gone crazy for the show! To be honest, I find this a strange attraction to bring to the town, given that a Motorhead concert on Whitestrand would be roundly shouted down because of noise and crowd control issues, However I can also see I’m being a stuffy old kill joy, and must defer to democratic wishes, so I just hope my camera’s shutter speed is quick enough to catch the buggers when they ‘roar down the ria’, otherwise I’ll have to ask for a re – ru SALCOMBE IN THE WORLD I suppose it was only a matter of time before mutterings from Whitehall would be heard about our venture – is this Admiral Alexander Admiral Rtd truly serious about a Principality, has he flipped, or more to the point, does he really think he can lop off a few square miles of Great Britain’s most beautiful real estate, without so much as, ‘By Your Leave your Majesty?’ In a noisy altercation with a senior civil servant, it seems my secretary told the fellow to stop being so hysterical and read Missive 18 in which Peter Horobin explains that even through the process of gradual dismemberment of his body, he would always be Peter Horobin, so by that same token, Great Britain would always be ‘Great’, albeit just a fraction smaller in terms of ‘Britain’. I’m sure we’ll find accommodation with London over this – after all, despite various difficulties, Monaco seems to co – exist alongside France.
As ever, Alex. |
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You are hopefully getting to know me well enough to appreciate how amused I am at the reference to homo sapiens being “intelligent”, but setting that aside, the courage of Mr Funes is most surely ground breaking and draws me closer to the potential of Leonard P.T. Maxen’s theories on our need for Heaven and its location in outer space (Missive 11). In openly contemplating opportunity for God to create other life forms in the universe (caused by the Big Bang), Mr Funes now allows us to most seriously test many religious conveniences (for all faiths), because whether he meant it or not, this gentleman must be on the cusp of abandoning Heaven as a post life ‘destination’. If that matter can be constructively debated – without hysteria please, we stand to confront many interesting consequences, including that none of us can be rewarded with the prize of deflowering 100 virgins if we slaughter enough innocent people in a shopping mall. |
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MISSIVE I was minded to return to more earthly musings this month – perhaps with further notions to help develop our Constitution, but something has irritated me, whilst on another matter something else has stimulated the grey matter. So regarding the former, I’m frankly fed up with John Simpson’s illegal presence in Zimbabwe, about which he keeps telling us the BBC’s banned from the Country and what danger he and his colleagues are in. It’s hateful what’s going on there, and we don’t need his hushed, trembling voice to add theatre to what is in fact a very serious drama being played out (Missive 25). However, remaining with the BBC, and in more pleasant mode, I’m still trying to find the name of the scientist / philosopher who was mentioned in an excellent documentary about the Universe – indeed about the Universe having a definitive boundary, beyond which there is seemingly another one, with presumably more of the same thereafter, until we might begin to define Infinity itself? Wonderfully, the programme reminded me of a dear chum, Ian Gillan, who’s own perception of infinity is talked about in his Autobiography, where he looks at the subject from the viewpoint of a child. And exceptionally, I shall use up some of this month’s journal in quotation. “I was about 8 years old when I first considered the magnitude and mental challenge of infinity – looking out of windows at the stars, or gazing in daytime at the blue sky, beyond which it is black. The answer to my questions was always given in terms of ‘things going on forever’ which seemed crazy…..I saw in every room that there were walls and a door. Standing in the garden there were more walls and a gate and every street was somehow enclosed as well. But looking to the sky, there were no walls and no doors. Only space, infinite space and it just made no sense…….I’d dream of ways to enclose all spaces with walls, contain them and especially the sky!……” I’d recommend readers to pay attention to the musings and theories of this excellent gentleman; a position of High Office is available to him in The Principality when he has the time! SALCOMBE TODAY Staying with ‘irritation’, and with the first part of The 2009 Salcombe Festival’s fund raising programme over, I’m forced to address a matter which I know has also upset the Festival’s Chairman David Cohen for several years. He tells me 2006 was the watershed year for him, when a local chappie and some of his chums accused him of dragging Salcombe down with rock n’ roll. “David, we should be like Henley or SALCOMBE IN THE WORLD Still borrowing from my ‘exclusive’ with ‘Cohen’, he says the history of The Salcombe Festival and decision to spend this year with a ‘Fringe Fund Raiser’ has proved inspirational to those who now sit at his left and right hands on the much enlarged committee. As a result of their pontifications, and offering the event as a management model, he’s now utterly convinced our priority with the Principality must be to focus on a single objective. “Alex, listen to me” he exhorted, “as with the Festival, we must have “Vision and a Clear Identity!” Which I make 2 objectives, but before I could respond, he sneezed very violently three times, and pottered off in the direction of the Whitestrand loos! |
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MISSIVE TWENTY NINE - July 2008 My advisor sat in at the Open Forum of the Town Council on 23rd July where the architects made a sketchy presentation of how their developer clients are thinking for the new Marine Hotel. That it was ‘sketchy’ is not a criticism because we were on notice to expect just that and as such the mood in the public ‘gallery’ was kindly and appreciative. However, I’m afraid this is simply not going to be a viable scheme – too much costly infrastructure and building, albeit in fine architecture, ‘to wit’ I have this sad feeling I can write the script for the future of our landmark site. As a precaution I respectfully suggest South Hams District Council begin making provision for enforcing ‘existing use’ requirements and even being ready with Compulsory Purchase powers, given the exceptional importance of the site in the community. It was 4.00 am (31st instant) and the burglar alarm went off! Well setting aside that my highly trained dog, Benny, showed no interest whatsoever in what or who might be unlawfully lurking in the nooks and crannies of the estate, the upset at least had me awake for breakfast BBC Radio Devon and their re- occurring debate which questions if there are aliens out there. With the increasing release of Pentagon papers and interviews from (hopefully) trusted individuals worldwide, I’m now certain such a universal force visited Salcombe – that it actually came to my residence on the 31st. Well don’t scoff – you’re all obsessed with a pile of rubble in Israel or Palestine having divine status, so what’s so unreasonable with my theory? Anyway, whoever or whatever visited last night; you are most welcome to return – and perhaps with a few hours notice, we can explore if we share anything in common? |
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MISSIVE THIRTY – August 2008 |
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MISSIVE THIRTY ONE – September 2008
With the trillions of ££££s being printed to prop up the banks, it must be incredibly difficult for the parents of that little three year old girl to understand why Government money is not available for a few cancer arresting pills which might give her father a little more time to watch his daughter grow up, and for her know who daddy is, and in ‘soon time’ was. Of course I realise these tablets are a little costly, but no more than the price of lunch still being served in the boardrooms of those who criminally brought us to where we are now. Shame on you all! As ever, Alex. As with most decent people, September has seen your Admiral coming to terms with his savaged pension arrangements. Normal services and formats will be restored for October. I have no doubt that there will be much to reflect on. |
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MISSIVE THIRTY TWO– October 2008 Ever in listening mode, I incline to the view we shelve our column ‘Salcombe in the World’ for the time being, and I thank Garth Rokson for writing as follows. “Alex, your journalism plus ‘Salcombe Today’ is that incisive and worthy, we are better served by these commentaries enjoying more editorial space, although you should not exclude issues which concern our place in the world and longer term aspirations” Part One ‘In 1943, 70% of the National Income had been spent on the war. This year the cost of the war has meant 126 quid per head of the population. Now that gives us something to think about. We all know that this war has cost thousands of millions of pounds and the great mystery is where did all the money come from? In peacetime there was never any money for vitally needed projects for the good of the nation, but when there is a war, as if by magic the money suddenly becomes available’ Part Two I suppose the Russell Brand and Jonathan Ross hiatus merits a few words, not least because during my recent overnight train journey to London some poor soul jumped in front of the locomotive. Well I’m not going to offer cheap humour with linkage to the two scenarios, but suffice that I find the salaries paid to the two entertainers to be in serious imbalance to the wage drawn by my train driver who had to deal with the horror of the occasion. Add now that this was apparently the ninth time the poor fellow had been confronted with such a tragedy and I might dare to suggest that the wrong citizens are being paid the stupid money? SALCOMBE TODAY I thought I had witnessed about everything in life, but obviously not. You see as my good lady wife and I stood in silent contemplation for those who lost their lives in the several theatres of wars, past and present, so this awful young man walked past the Memorial and through the ranks of Remembrance Day participants, without a single thought for the obvious reverence of the occasion. To add further insult, he carried two plastic carrier bags from one of the town’s exclusive clothing outlets. Frankly, people like that should be bundled into a car and taken to Dartmoor from which place they should be abandoned to find their way back. Or better still, told to get lost? As ever, Alex. |
